Something in Your Hand?

Into a Belfast pub comes Paddy Murphy looking like he’d just been run over by a train. His arm is in a sling, his nose is broken, his face is cut and bruised and he is walking with a limp.

“What happened to you? asks Sean the bartender.

“Jamie O Conner and me had a fight.” says Paddy.

“That little shit, O Conner ” says Sean “He couldn’t do that to you, he must of had something in his hand.”

“That he did. says Paddy ”a shovel is what he had, and a terrible licken he gave me with it”

“Well” says Sean, “you should have defended yourself, didn’t you have something in your hand?”

”That I did” said Paddy…”Mrs. O Conner’s Chest, and a thing of beauty it was, but useless in a fight.”